Imagine : what made u to suddenly click this post and read it unknowingly !!! … that’s the irony on which this blog is based on 😜😌👍🏾…
This is a real life example I wanted to show u ,it actually took me some time to grow both my accounts …in which one was a girl identity and another one was a guy .
It’s just a study experienced by me on making myself and my friends to understand ….what are the conditions on why people consider some things seriously from a joke and other serious things to be taken lightly .
(To be fair both the accounts had same followers ,one account was insta and another was on twitter ) And actually to be pretty fair , the insta one had more followers than Twitter one.
So assembling on why people like some silly things ,
if u see the first tweet pic , there is no context at all , but still 300 ❤️ …and yah …to be fair ..I know genetically mens are weak over sexual interactions .
I felt like I’m a great writer after writing this 😜🤷…
So moving on to the second tweet , and here it actually compares a humorous thought between the two worlds and past and present , giving rise to a new idea of Thought in realization in reality of what I really miss …and to be exact in it , it got only 12❤️
If u call this …ITS FAIR .well , fuck Ur ego , 😂…I know u can’t …coz I couldn’t .
So what does it mean?!! …Are people drawn to the things said by a experienced lady more than a experienced guy due to her attractiveness gender sex ?!!
Or does it mean , do people always look the amount of likes , a tweet received , before they plan to take that tweet seriously after reading it ?!! 😅💯…( This one is something I do at times )
It’s ok … there’s nothing wrong in it , it’s just a coming to know stuff that we must be aware of what actions we take and accept in the day to day lives .🌸
The study is still being continued by me ….and plz feel free to share Ur Thoughts on what u think about this .
Feel free to DM me on Insta and follow me over there for more crazy effects : Instagram 📸
I often notice me and the people who live with me and my surroundings , coming across a common problem in Their lives in decision makings .
And I literally never knew , y god always gives us two paths to choose on.. when we only pray to him to give us success .🤦😜🤪
And yah … everyone faces this similarity and the struggle to choose between so many options that can change the view of Ur life that u present it up as Ur future .
Here , obviously we’re so afraid that what would happen if I chose something else that’s wrong for me , and I missed and messed up with the right path that was just ahead of me !!! …and mostly we get self possessed with us if things goes really… really ….wrong .
And u come to land up on a state called self depressed upon the decisions u make .
For such good people who thinks like really in a technical way and in a society threat and in a safety concerned multiple confusing way!!! I really appreciate them and I would simply suggest to pick up the first thought that comes in ur mind and do it with full satisfaction , that ur mind choses for u unknowingly , but the first answer that suddenly rises in Ur head as soon u think about the problem …” that thought ” .😲🤗
This decision advice was actually from a psychotherapist to me years ago , and I find it pretty good and easy for me in taking my decisions and living with it , and also I can guarantee u as it never goes wrong with me nor do u fail , coz it’s a simple secret satisfaction u put on the thought that u are gonna choose the first thought that comes out of those two options that u have in mind .😌
I know , I can see Ur eyes seeming a bit confused over here , ok …lemme put it simple words :
In a randomly decision decision taking , between an yes and a no option choice that u fix in Ur head , apply the first thought that comes to Ur mind , if u get an yes … apply the yes qualities and let’s goo in lyf , if u get a no firstly thought in Ur mind , it’s ok 🙌, look out or verify your other options and opportunities that makes u to take a firm decision much stronger .❤️
After all , it’s u who is gonna live with the decisions u make , and it’s more simple to come out of self pityness that comes in the orderly thinking if u fail , rather than failing bcuz of someone else , as he made Ur decisions , since u asked him to take Ur decisions
And my simple theory is , You only realize the real threat and the value of Ur life , only when a gun point is holder ahead of ur head and the situation must seem like , you are in the edge tip of Ur beautiful life , coz it’s u over there holding the last breath of Ur life and there is no theory yet assuming what will happen after u die , and trust me , no one has ever taken initiative to find it too , coz they know it’s pointless .
It’s exactly the same scenario , it’s Ur decision that u must take in Ur own coz it’s ur life and only u can understand the value of Ur lyf with the heart that is beating in u unknowingly , so y not take the decisions by urself !!!
And this is where I help u with what I know : take up the first thought and the first answer that clicks in Ur mind suddenly out of nowhere as u ask the question to urself and maximum apply it into actions without any more further thoughts and thinking on an on about is , which u deeply know that’s waste .🤷🌸
It’s so fuckin simple , it’s we who complicate it ; 🤯
U have a problem in Ur mind , suddenly u get a thought like an answer arising unknowingly in our mind .
Now don’t waste anytime , I understand we are prone to confusions .🤦😲…that’s today’s world !!!
Apply the first thought that came to Ur mind like an answer to Ur question , and start working on it ASAP .
U succeed or not , who cares , fuck what will people or Ur parents think about u , be strong and have faith in what u do , and I’m damn sure u will chose the right path out of all the confusions .
If u again say NO .. I’ll fail !!! 😦, fuck it ..hey!!!☺️ Notice, unknowingly u got satisfaction here , coz u made Ur decisions 🤩👏🤙
And not by some lame guys who only want u if u have money and use in u !!!
Isn’t it always interesting to think about LOVE from different varieties of angleS.
I mean , the love We have for our parents , our teachers , our dog or cat , the love for our child , the love for Ur partner , the love for Ur ego and like these !!! I can fill the entire page with the love we show towards each and everybody who has created us or to whom we created .
But according to this title of this blog , when I talked about love , automatically our imaginations went to the love we have for our partner , without any outside hesitations , and I agree it’s normally bcuz of whatever we see and especially everywhere we see today or on Ur phone or out on posters !!! , mostly we get dragged to all these common things of loving a unknown stranger unknowingly which is totally normal , and also ,which is regarded my many recent studies; as powerful too .
I mean ; Just think about it , Our love is strong when we start to love, but as time flows and seasons pass , obviously we all can feel that the love we showed at the starting of days to our partner is slowly fading away , and u tend to find someone whom you meet outside randomly once in a while , feeling attractive to u than Ur partner whom u love a lot…and if Ur ethics and character wise sympathy.. is weak …. everything gets messed up 🤔😜.. totally !!!
And also there is this unknowing attractions in u , and u start to suddenly feel it , when u have a fight with Ur partner and in certain circumstances where u both get seperated of some ego issues and she leaves u in middle of the strange night , without making u satisfied with proper reasonings …..and in this time ; u feel an unknowing attractions to Ur old partner after a long time and u get confused suddenly .. landing is some strange questions like …. “should I fight daily or what? …to get this love feeling on her ..so that she gets pissed off in me and leaves me like this daily ?🤔”
Well …the answer is a soft …NO .
Like mentioned above , when it comes to loving someone Forever , it feels good while Sayin those words , but when u gotta live according to those words coz they meant ” forever “…well … that’s where it gets trickier with the word complicated .
” Loving someone Forever “…. doesn’t the line seems aww !!! .. sweet powerful words we say to melt down a person in some situations of romance .
Later …in long term life u regret 😅😜…and trust me , this is totally normal ..and what everyone faces .
In my long term realization mistake experiences ….I regard ” love you “…as a feeling that stands stable with money in a additional format when u include by giving birth to a new word in it : Forever .
Now don’t start all those conversations and notices of people protests and basic voices …who say ..that true love exists and bullshit !!!
Nothing is fuckin real .🤷🥀
When u love someone , it’s so simple methodology .. that u gonna keep them with u happily forever .. so u say …u gonna keep them happy . Well , how to get that happiness ? , So to answer that , u bring a new word money into it , by bringing her flowers and taking her to some nice fancy restaurants and having a nice honeymoon and trips with her .
Well , so all these comes with MONEY . So I’m pretty clear over here ...that love is money…and stop fooling urself by saying, ” she loves me for just money !!! “😰
Coz when u say that , u r the idiot over there 😂😅 …coz like I said , the words might look beautiful when u say such powerful words on the spot , but time is a powerful word too …it’s fucks up everything in u and within u …when u don’t have money …and she or he won’t stay with u , when she feels like , u are really no more worthy to keep her happy !!! I mean who will stay …not even me 😜…
I know it hurts !!! , But love is a connection between wanting to have someone with u with benefits to survival , coz after all , life is a selfish word too .
So just be careful , at first it will all look so nice , with the satisfaction in bed.. and everything u both deserve ….but when it comes to a long term u used at the beginning ” FOREVER “..it complicates …and also according to me , better don’t get into all these loving forever stuff until u have a proper job and a proper bank balance , coz understand this , food is something that money buys too …and the main base of love ..is to keep Ur partner life long happily and deep down u know it’s not possible without money!!! 😊❤️… so stop fooling urself by faking my words or making me as the villian..it’s no use at all. 🤷
Also speaking about to those ; who got all the money in the world and still u find to have shortage on loving Ur partner like u did at the beginning of Ur story of life ,
Well , as far as what I see according to my perspective ; I would say , find a support that makes u both going on !!! …like Ur both common interests or something that u both like to do and something u both are really good at and u both find urself feeling happy and useful to each other while doing that … I’m so considering that this fact will make u both glow again .
Thus , as much as I see on my parents too … everything is connected when it comes to love. …it’s a whole bundle package that u have to accept when it comes to ” being together forever ” .
As all those bullshit lines like , she loves me for money !!! , She cheated me on him ..and making some fuckin arguments: By making a connection like with the love u have is because of the child u have bought into this world ! And pretty much related arguments and arguing is complete madness and no point at all ….it’s like drinking poison and waiting for somebody else to take U to the hospital !!! Which is not gonna happen🤷⛄ .
At the end …it always comes down to a simple concept of how well u maintain Ur relationships like u maintain your looks is something important …and my advice is always look for the problems solutions in the base of it …it will be easy to find solutions and prevent u from taking some stupid decisions like divorce .🤦
As we know that marriage is just a simple formality to show to the world that u both are together …not to the “both of u” . U both know in the invisible air …that u share a unknown bond that makes you to feel happy when u both are together …and that is not something u show to the world and it’s private life and it belongs to u and her/ him .
So think about it practically and take care of yourselves on decision making process ☺️ .
If u like …then comment 😜👇
Feel free to comment about any questions and do follow me on Instagram 📸
I actually came with this topic , when today I got my cousin’s buying such costly masks eventhough they had several plain masks with them lying around on floor .
Suddenly this topic raised into my head out of nowhere ; why are we wearing masks ?? and I thought about the times where we don’t even care about them except some Korean and Chinese people who care about beauty levels too much .
I also came past across so many articles that this is turning into some marketing psycology .
I mean …. just think about this : There are thousands of people out there suffering with this infection and we are here purchasing masks for our style on fashion , just for a stupid satisfaction , that would think you are cool !!! when u go out .
Well , doesn’t that sound insane ..huh . 😕
I mean …it’s nothing …but it’s so hard to think …that our Motto is getting changing slowly with invisible time . We were once concerned about a single life , now since hundreds of ppl die every week , the value for one life is lost !!!
And all we do now is laugh at some dangerous jokes by saying , ” hey did u cough , I think u gotta Corona !!! 😂”…just see how we have fucked up the humanity on Ur own 😨.
After all it Matters about survival isn’t it !!!🥶, it is depressing that we won’t get it until it happens to us 🤷😔
And I really get anxious 😤, when they have turned this fear in us ,into a marketing psycology just so that they can sell out their MASKS .. isn’t that CHEAP ?!!..just look at their intentions!!!….just like when we pity a dog in a street and feed it with the leftovers that we’ve got.
And don’t think we are much different from this …it’s so soo similar like we have gotta buy masks anyway to protect ourselves and they pity us by making the MASKS more stylish in a fashionable way such that we forget about the reason for why we buy it …and they also know that we don’t have any other options left when it comes to that extended situations .😲
And it’s unknown by u in such a way that u forget that it’s Ur life they are putting at stake , and it’s also proven , some laser designed masks are not meant to protect ourselves from the bad air as it’s of the cheap material they use .😰
Which also goes by a popular Sayin that careless mistakes are always reasons for a persons quick death !!! 💯
So plz be careful and take care of urself in a different perspective way as the world is getting trickier everyday on the fact of when it comes down to all about survival .🤕
Do comment if u like ..and Follow me on Instagram 📸
But is it that, do you really win?!! ….or you always convince urself that u won in front of other ppl’s eyes and for Ur Satisfaction. .
Just a small example :
When you play cards with your friends …have u noticed that once we win the game , we never think of playing it again nor do we tend to take the card to shuffle it again after a long continuous play .
But if u lose , without even knowing yourself u wanna play again and u start to shuffle the cards again …. until u wanna win someone …or to make urself satisfied …..that u won at the end ….and u wanna unknowingly prove that u won in front of others ppl’s or Ur friends eyes .
And trust me , if u girlfriend or Ur boyfriend is watching u while playing , u feel so desperate ….that u want nothing more in life anymore except this win 😂🤦
And don’t feel shyness smiling in Ur face now ….. unknowingly this is how we work and this is how unknowingly we make some situations so hard on ourself for a cheap satisfaction outcome .
Now don’t tend to think like the SATISFACTION IS SOMETHING CHEAP !!!😜
Without satisfaction, one can’t even drink his coffee ☕ properly . So some words are damn powerful , choose them and apply them carefully 😨
With the example above with the cards ….is exactly a same kind of personality idea in a person who exposes when he really wants to win a argument or a conversation so badly …
This happens mainly because of the pressure he’s being put at that place ,…. the people who watches him, ….the belief that he believes in ….all this matters to him .🤪😨
So ultimately …all he thinks about is … ” WINNING “….he doesn’t think of what it takes to make him to win at that kind of place he stands in .
And it really triggers him to temper when you make him believe that what he believes in.. is wrong ….and it will become so worse when he realises that maybe what u say is correct and that he is the wrong one, over there…
Now don’t think he will agree his mistake and make u win …..MAHN!!!… THAT NEVER HAPPENED IN A HUMANS HISTORY .😲😅
This is the stage where his EGO gets triggered and he takes the past and compares it to make it possible for the people to take a bid on his side and see what he talks .
THIS PUBLIC AND MEDIA ARE ALWAYS A BAD INFLUENCE …ITS ALWAYS CONNECTED SOO DEEP INTO A MAN’S PRESTIGIOUS EMOTIONS …and u can never give up on that !!!
Once he start using BAD WORDS , if u are really brave …you can understand who is really guilty .
So he does his dirty tricks and pulls some strings and he wins !!! 👏
Wow…what a win right ?!! 🤷🤦 ….and everybody thinks he’s really what he says AND they move on … after all they are just public …all they need is some BREAKING NEWS and some interesting aspect to see and they move on with Their lives.
But this where we are dOING A BIG MISTAKE!!! …we confronted that the person won , but actually WHAT happens when it comes to psycology ethical thinking ….. mainly sociologists say this is where the real part starts …
like I said only the person who loses the game , controls the Ego not the one who wins , and this is where an unknowing realisation starts coming to his mind , as like isaid , he might have proved to a wide range of unknown ppl that HE WON … but he is the only one who thinks it ain’t him …it’s the opposite opponent (consider as you ) who spoke onto him into the reality that he realised unknowingly while arguing with him .
And obviously with time , he changes his disproved beliefs into the ugly truths that the opponent ( you ) talked into him …coz obviously who would believe in something that’s not true and in something that he realises that it’s worth no more in believing .
So it’s just a simple take , where u are really the winner …it’s just OK That u lost in public ..making him as the winner to some unknown strangers…but trust me ,when he thinks that u really won over him …I think u don’t need anything else more than that 🙌💯
Be real brave on what u talk and realizing the good cause in what you give up for , if it is to change somebody’s else life for a greater good .
Is caring too much a problem or a safe feel zone ?, different point and position takin views !!….ain’t it ?🖤
When it comes to the care that u have with Ur brothers and parents , well ….. that’s something that will last life long however u act or react . 😊
So what about the person you care , who becomes Ur family from an outsider or a stranger ?!!
Just a simple questionnaire difference , how will we feel …if someone cares about me ?…..like checking on me always ? , Checking on my phone always ? , Asking unnecessary questions like y was I talking with him / her ? ….well , isn’t this care ? ….but there is something in us that possess these type of care…. righ?🙃🤪
And trust me , if u are someone who is ready to give up yourself for all this questions above , maybe it’s time to stop expecting from Ur partner to be like this , and FYI , this is how life works , only opposite personality attracts to each other .
Coz sometime , there is always this time , you wanna love someone and u wanna have them in Ur life and later u end up missing something in Ur life like , I need someone to fill my weaknesses or the gap in me , and u end up finding a more suitable partner , ending up in a tied up relationship that aldready exists .
And if u r someone , who doesn’t care about those above questions that I asked , then trust me , u are a person who is gonna end up caring too much for the person u love .
I know and I can aldready feel , u are starting to ignore the concept that I’m trying to create here , but also do remember that ..ppl who really love each other balances their relationship and mostly give up on themselves just to make their darling happier and grow old together…and obviously sacrifices are made and especially I don’t wanna talk about the insane thing we land up doing for the person we love 👻 ….
Coz after all love is a powerful emotion that’s created in us and a life long memory that last with us even though u call him/her ex 😂😜….and we gotta limit the things we aren’t perfect in and stop caring too much about the person we love in order to balance the character that flows in us too or obviously u end up on the easy task : DIVORCE … just a Appomattox that u don’t wanna try the hard part and it isn’t Ur fault …it’s just that u r given a option to leave Ur partner on divorce , and what if this divorce was never created and u have a life where u must stay with a partner u chose once ?!!🤪 …then what will u do ? …. u’ll start acting maturely safe or what ?!!😂
And also understand this concept …that divorce is just to make ppl know that u aren’t with Ur partner no more ….it’s not a block that limits the feeling that u have for Ur ex , when u start missing him later when u don’t get to have him anymore … aren’t rules strange !??👹
I just also wanna share this lovely girl labeeba .. I met , but she had something in her mind that she failed to share with me and she reacted in a different style such that ppl around her worry too much about her …and there was this one time she told me something strange about the voices that she hears in her head and it was a time where seeing her became something impossible ….and I started to agree that I cared too much for her , and i felt strange coz I didn’t know y she said me and not her parents, and I Felt like she would have obviously felt that I’m empowering pityness over her and yah I did !!! Coz That’s how we have to react if we are normal and , all she did was block me on Instagram and everywhere….out of the 100% care that she wanted from her and not from a third person… ME !!!(that’s what she said 😨) ,and I did totally get it , how she would have felt if I was in her place going through some rough patches on a time like this !😨
Being a powerful influencer as a psycologist….Even I felt that I was being ME ….when I talked with her and not this psycology me , that I know how to explain ppl how to get through these stuff .
It’s just a simple theory about me , that even though I’m so strong and I feel stronger….there is this sometimes …that the emotional ME comeS outside of me and start caring ABOUT the person I love, to start to care most unknowingly, when I’m someone who doesn’t even want my parents to care about me so much …😟🤪
Wow …. doesn’t nature works so perfectly good and yah obviously FUCK LAWS AND RULES !!!😊❤️😨
There are these moments, we always get this feeling after a long problematic trouble, that I’m are having a happy moment now , after this so called hard day’s .
And so welcome into my world , where we talk some crazy feelings like this …
There are this times , we feel happy and there are this times were we feel sad and worried , but the happiest part come after a long journey in the sad past …whereas the sad part comes , once we are happy after a long while .
So is it like the soul of our life don’t want us to be happy ??!
A simple answer could be , No…as I have talked about the concept of life with no problems on my blogs , well.. life isn’t meant to be always happy and sad , but we all know that being happy is no trouble , but being sad , could drag u to so many of its brothers like headache , anxiety and depression stuffs .
Okay …so we r clear about this . (The difference between happy and sad )
Also plainly ,Something’s just look so easy , when u stand in the audience place , isn’t it ?….and we start judging ppl when we ask them to say their sorrows by asking them to say by saying : hey , I’m not the guy who judge ppl’s by their past , try me ??! And then later , we end up judging them and trust me , this isn’t ur fault , this is simply how life works .
Coz there are always this something , you can’t resist , that’s inside you , as we all would notice that we are happy now with no problems , but we fail to notice how did we end up being happy ??! ……so it answers my question , u were sad once ….,
• Trust me Friends , if u understand the basics of feelings and emotions , u r the powerful influencer in this world .
And note this too , not everyone can understand even when u know about this .
I just wanna surprise u ppl with so many aspects of u ,..seeing things , with ur eyes especially , the view of you , when u want something and the view that changes about it when u have it with u ; the happy endings u always wanted to be , and then u realising that something is missing within u ,once u r at the place where u feel happy .
Noticing , whatever to have or not , u always wanna miss something thats more about it and then u fail to let it out forward by stressing it into depression issues of being sad again .
Also we all know that being FaMoUs is the most hilarious thing , once to become famous , obviously u will feel like u have everything with u , and later u will obviously feel something missing in u , …..coz at first u might like all those camera flashes on u , but later u find urself searching for loneliness unknowingly and u wanna run away to become the so called audience that u know u can never be at that point …(a main reason y so many famous ppl end up their life especially in this lonely Corona periods ) thus , there is always something we run for however u r .
And that’s always y scholar’s say , that being a normal person is where u can enjoy this world life to the fullest .
It’s totally Ur decision to blv it or not … and
Coming back to my arena , what is so called happy endings ??!! And just fuck all these things u see in films and stuff and u all know that someone is always watching us , might be god, so it’s just a simple aspect that our life is always a film to someone , it’s just that we don’t know that it is happening and it’s just a simple fake smile that u always run to , working Ur ass off , but u always know that it doesn’t mean anything , coz true happy endings doesn’t exists until u die to be resting in peace .
And only god alone knows that atleast we would get to be happy inside the sands covered in a box , as the life after life is something like a real mystery, in which 76 % of all religious beliefs lye .
I know this is an interesting topic 😂 and I would definitely wanna hear Ur opinions too , stop being shy and start commenting ….💯👍🏾
Instead of just messing around with formalities , let’s jump into what’s today on mind talks …
Have u ever imagined …y ppl laugh at us ???!!
Hmmm…..Obviously one would be ….coz of Ur lame jokes or becuz u do something funny all the time .
Isn’t that a really cool feeling !!! 🌸
Okay ….what others , Mmmm….times when u mess up !!! , do something stupid or end up in karma …..yah ..sure thing ,right …..👻
It’s like …yah , we a good person !!! , But there are times we laugh at something and someone, but we feel unethical , when others laugh at us for the same reason .
Also , there are ppl , who think in a corner …why are my friends laughing at something that is really ” NEW “and somethings that really makes sense ?.
And there are this situations where we have to laugh , just becuz our Friends are laughing at someone , and we have to act along them too and start laughing right !!! …. isn’t the rule of a friendship sooo complicated ?!!🤦🤪
But this is me …and yah there are some ppl like me, who ….laugh while others are laughing ….( We know that running alone won’t help ) ….so yah ..we laugh, but it is the same us , who think about it later like, why did I laugh at him ?!! And for Ur info , 1/10 like this thoughts are present in every mind .
And trust me , there are some ppl I met in my life who amuse me with such inspiring ideas about future development ….but I all I did was laugh at them along with others ….
But later I realized something in me saying to myself …. That …there were always ppl laughing at those olden times , when someone use to say that one day we’ll fly in the air , we’ll have a device to communicate with a friend who is countries away ….and this so many questions in my mind make me think ….MAHN , ALL THEY DID WAS LAUGH !!!😟 , but it did all happen …righ, and now those mobile phones are our life and trust me , i know how it feels …if u don’t have Ur mobiles with u for even one day ?!!!😂👍🏾
We just feel like we lost an arm .👻😜…simple
The concept is , there were always these so called ppl’s ….but humanity stepped up …right ? ….coz sometimes we make a thinking in our mind , and we laugh at ppl’s , assuming they are fools …but it feel like ...the ppl who are laughing are fools …coz trust me or not , we just keep laughing forgetting that the most influential and FaMoUs ppl of this world are ppl who came from a light in their head called ” ideas “and defnetly not books…and there were ppl at those times too …who were laughing ….but the irony over here is ….they were only laughing by making their opponents stronger …
And these so called opponents , made themselves strong And change their ideas to reality to just make ppl stop laughing at them !!! And how much powerful is that ….coz we land up just laughing again at someone else , not realising that we made our opponent costlier , coz he the one with “idea”…
All I did was laugh at this too …this idea of me thinking like this ….coz isn’t realization a complicated that makes us fools by just making us laugh by making us think about what we think itself is stupider.. isn’t it?…..coz after all u realize it’s the human nature and u can do nothing about it and u go to sleep in the half way process.
And I did start working on this time , To ask me to stop laughing and start thinking , coz imagination exists !!! , Coz this phone that u r holding in Ur hands was once a big fat joke for centuries ….can u imagine ?!! 👻
Ok fine … don’t believe me …go to history …as even all it says too is : In a fight between a idea and a laugh , the idea is the one that always wins , coz the ppl who laugh the most , have too much pain inside them , that makes them casually use the powerful word :
” Move on“
Isn’t life a interesting fat big joke …huh ?!!! Coz all Shakespeare did was fade away a reality truth by saying that after all we were god’s actors acting in his small role of world life .
There are this time , we talk with some people , like total randomly ,
we would have met them through someone and at someplace and unknowingly we start to like em and everything they do is something u like , and their appearance and their behaviour is something u posses .
But here , u also find something inside u , that says ; Maybe he ain’t a good person like u think , and u find a inner voice communicating with u Sayin to know about him ..in a resisting way …and it’s like u like him a half , but unknowingly u don’t like something in him that makes u to take this next move ….and u start to :
( This is a pretty complicated topic of my thoughts , so concentrate and read . )
And trust me , there are this so many things that I do especially to maybe satisfy me , and it’s not jealousy , it’s just that maybe I wanna satisfy myself that he ain’t the good guy that I’m thinking of , and I know that u know this feeling in u that I’m talking about….it’s actually that there is no word found for this feeling I’m trying to explain still , but I’m sure some of u know about this feeling in u , and mostly lemme be frank over here , Don’t miss this guys in Ur lyf , as u won’t feel this way with everybody !
And tbh , this is not love . 🤪😂
Lemme put it in this way , u always love somebody to fill the gap in u , something that’s missing in u , coz u don’t like a person who is like u , u like to choose a person who u r actually missing in u unknowingly . The you !!! , who comes out of u when u r alone, and yah …. I’m trying to explain this !!!
Eventhough the quotes page is filled with loving Ur soulmate stuff , trust me , the above passage is Ur reality….it’s a simple concept that u blv more in things you see ! ,And yah there are case ppl give more importance to love more than desire and obviously in most cases it would end up in divorce .
And in that feeling that I mentioned above , if u finally get to prove that he’s a bad person as u pictured them in Ur head …. U get satisfied and u move on …BUT !!! if he’s not the guy u though and Ur senses start liking them too much !!! , u devolop some unknown liking for that person inside u , bcuz the wrong thinkin mentality inside u , transforms u into someone new .
It’s mostly a feeling like , u feel belonged with them , when u r around them and u start to overwhelm in love tears when they’re not around u .
( I’m being too careful with the words that I choose here , so I’m confident about what I’m about )
After all it’s a feeling that hasn’t been put to words yet , but we all do feel this way with some new faces we meet everyday unknowingly , coz after all ….each one of us stalk somebody other than our fav celebrity in our personal lives . 😉
Isn’t it ?🙃❤️
We have changed in so many ways , but understand this , we always hold some things in common always , for example : EMOTIONS .
I know that there r always something out of nothing that we find ways to cry ….
It doesn’t mean that we wanna make us cry , but technically somehow we land up here unknowingly and due to some circumstances .
Have u seen that we unknowingly stop a person who rushes to beat up in a fight and also sit down near a friend to make him feel good when he cries ….but at that time it just never comes to our mind that we also do it and we never regret when we do the same thing as they do , and someone else has to stop us like we do now , coz my friend is fighting over there .
So I could put it in my words that there are things that happen with us that we could not regret , coz sometimes we might feel irritated when someone is fighting for something that he needs and we find it useless , coz we don’t know it’s importance as he sees from his angle .
But here ,we have a different glance when we fight for the same thing , and someone else lands up looking us like ….maybe he’s a fool !!!
So it’s just the platform u take up and u see yourself and the person who is sitting in front of u … crying unknowingly what to do next in his life .
But do remember this , crying is just a satisfaction to yourself and a care of showing to others that u got emotions too…
Girls use it as a weapon against their husbands ….😜😳….well , I guess that’s a different topic .
But at the end it all comes to a conclusion …of what u r gonna do next ? …. eventhough u cry ….u care about Ur maturity , … U always land up in a conclusion …of thinking about what to do next ??
So ….I just wanna motivate , stop crying for Ur Satisfaction and making u feel weak and making people feel pity over u …than standing up straight without crying at a place u need to cry , not hitting at a place u need to hit …. Trust me , this all might look so lame , but remember …words always hold their power and saying sorry somewhere where the whole crowd thinks Ur opponent is guilty ….. always holds a secret power to u who react in a real way that I call this .
And like I said ….this might hear lame ..but psycologically , some of these emphasized actions always holds a power and respect on the guy who does this by making a step down .
Coz understand this idiot !!! , It’s just for him what it looks like he’s stepping down …but actually he’s stepping up on his image that is running in our inner minds about him .
So …. isn’t it interesting ?!!🤪
Look do anything , but I just only regret the action of crying !!! Coz I never understood why cry when u have seen other ppl cried , when u got lot of options on Ur hands waiting to slap someone who made Ur tears fall on that same hands .💪
Once a upon a time , the world most effective influencers , tricked almost the whole world into believing that the world was flat !!! , Also in a variety of examples of I could talk about , I find the Banana one , most influential , coz till today so many people believe that they slip and fall when they step on a banana peel by mistake as nobody would intensionally waste a banana to slip over it. 🤷🤪
Eventhough there were so many scientific explanations on this , people can’t change their point of thinking over this , coz this is what they had seen and heard from their childhood ….from Tom and Jerry till mr.bean , I gotta admit , eliminate do exist . 😨
Coz what can I say more when u r still a believer on this theory that doesn’t even happen ??!
Just try and see whether u fall or what !!! 😭😂
I call all these stuffs , the ugly truths , coz there are always some things in our life that we can’t accept it as truth even though we personally know it is the truth .
Stay safe , stop tricking …I mean massive trickings 😂
I would like to start by saying I ain’t perfect ….I fuck up and I mess up
I agree !!! Totally .🌸
I’m just a bit concerned about the pressure we put on ourselves today , stressing about , y isn’t my blog or posts not getting the like that I expect it to ….even though I gotta have a good context in it.
And trust me , some of u ppl have so less likes on Ur blogs eventhough Ur context is totally so cool 🌸 and blowing Ur mind off ❤️💯
Just think it in this arena , Ur posts and blogs hasn’t reached enough viewers !!! , I think that’s what is happening … Coz I find some lame blogs getting 1000 + likes with no idea ….why ….and there are days I take time to laugh about such ppl , who likes some post , just becuz it’s written by a beautiful girl 😜 .
No offense ….coz u know ….this thing happens .💯
So stop pressurising urself over likes and feedback and satisfy urself , by saying that there are some ppl like me who admire Ur posts even though u got just 2❤️ on it ….I mean it seriously !!!
As it just lands up on simple influencial topic that u are always special .
And stop Ur ego in get getting a opinion about this topic like ….hey ! I don’t care about likes 😂…. trust me guys ….even I care about likes eventhough I talk about not to get worried about it ….coz like I said …No one is perfect !!!
Often times , we don’t like anyone except the ones we love to come to our house at all times periodically, I know u get offended …but we do hesitate … don’t fool me 🤪
But still we pretend to feel happy and invite them with the huge fake smile in our faces that could be given an Oscar according to the act we show up to ourselves when they come to our house.
And u make the formalities like wishing them , eventhough… if u don’t want to and asking about their family stuff though u don’t have to ….but we still ….coz we have an Oscar to ourselves always that floats in our ego to prove ourselves out of prestige .
Later …We ask …do they want coffee or tea , eventhough u don’t have sugar in your house and they have to say “no” at the first time u ask and while stressing at a point to make them have coffee , coz u wanna make them finish all the sugar u have in your house, making them unrealised that u have diabetes .
They too have a fake smile in their face , coz they feel u care for them by making coffee to a long term friend due to the word “Friendship”.
And at a point due to these formalities questions and talk he talks , and u answer like u r in ….the Eddie show…there comes a stage he forgets about the concept that he actually came to talk about to you and he catches another topic and get carried away in a formality question answers drinking your over-sugered coffee and unknowingly he comes to know that it was coffee at the end … where he realises at the moment that he drank thinking it was a tea .
And then when it becomes more than half an hour , it feels to him like he has sat for too long in someone’s house and he feel like a decade has passed and with no option he or she gets up and leave your house …. unknowingly and forgetting the reason why he came ….😂
It would be completely different kind of acting if Ur friend’s.. wife or husband is in the house ….and I’m pretty sure I don’t wanna discuss about what would happen on that 😜
As u manipulate Ur character for something that has been followed as a traditional respect like stuff for centuries …and u give up everything including something that u wanna talk …that is running in Ur mind … thinking what he would think if I ask about it ?? and u keep Ur …real u, shut !!! And end up asking the formality questions itself like u started in the beginning….
Nowadays , it had caused a major effect in bringing our friends to home …. regardingly thinking about what would my mom say ?!!….if I take them to my home …!!!
I know that we have to be respectful outside when u r with elders
But it’s not like to give urself up and Ur character and starting to act like u r an innocent fellow…
Coz unknowingly ,the topic , I’m talking about stands a base in transforming a fear in urself in thinking more about public opinion on u …
And now …I know that u would start commenting like ….bro!!! Don’t care about what people say of think …. just fuck em …..but trust me , u’ll be not the same person when u r in the field worrying about what would people think about u …it’s just that u satisfy urself by commenting it , as words make it easy on u to empower others …but u unknowingly know the truth , that u always care about what people say and think about you , coz after all u take it carelessly that it’s simply a text that I’m gonna type to this unknown guy as a brave comments….and I’ll be happy to say fuck urself !!! For this 🤷😳
Coz understanding the basics holds our life ….as I’m not trying to change anything over here ….I’m just afraid that we tend act everywhere like some good guy and we loose ourselves.. the real character of me…. and we start to act everywhere at first and then u realize a different love between Ur character and formalities than u r showing it in Ur own house Infront of Ur parents … hiding the real u and faking Ur own self .
And by not forgetting thatnowadays ….it has become worse as we all sit in front of each other happily in our house , but taking out your mobiles ratherthan words from your mouth….well , doesn’t that hurts … ain’t it ??!!!
I know …it’s the ugly truth ..coz there are always some truth’s that we can’t accept..but just think on it and be you !!!….and not some one you get by showing and talking formalities by modifying Ur character often in front of Ur own people ….coz Trust me… it’s the base of Ur pity life .
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I don’t know about you ppl , but I got to have these underwears that I call it , my lucky underwear !!! And I have no idea y I call it that way , but I notice that whenever I wear this underwear , I mean the day when I get to wear it after the cycle chain of wearing all my underwears , I get to wear this lucky one . And at first I thought it was a delusion of me thinking about this crazy stuff shits that runs in my mind but then later I realized to notice myself that when I had that day coming and I had to wear this underwear, without knowing myself…I felt like… Everything around me feels good and happens good like u feel like this day I’m going to have a good day and something lucky is waiting for me to take me to heaven …
Also I had these two underwears which I never touched them , and it’s not like it was smelly 🤪 like u think now , it’s just my simple beliefs that when I wore those underwears , something really bad happens to me , and yah …it had happened tooo .
What a fuckin stupid belief right….😜
But trust me , it happens , I mean when I wear my that one green ,my lucky underwear , definitely something happens good , I mean I get to talk to some pretty girl , or find a 100 rupees or money lying on the road and only I get to see it and what do u say about that .
And now don’t try to change tables , stand on what u thought at beginning of this blog ….🔆
Like I said , I had those two underwears which i never wore , I guess I just wore only once in my life time and later I wore them again but I burned them after that , not just throw ….so u could imagine that the amount of bad stuff that happens on the day that I get to wear those underwears ….and Don’t worry , I’ll say u ppl what happened if u really want me to say what happens that day when I wear them…
Once My mom was super pissed , she noticed me that I’m not wearing especially that two underwears , and once she commanded me like my army sergeant and I had to wear that underwear 🤕 and I was left with no option coz she was standing with a stick like rod to beat up me ….like a king standing to slaughter a lion and I never knew y she did that , coz after all it’s just an underwear right ??.
And plz don’t ask me how was that day ….coz it was the one of worst day of my lives….😵📸
Ok ok ….I can hear u ppl …so like I promised I’ll say u ppl , …..ok !!! This one time I bought a bunch of underwears , and I’m a guy who takes a lot of time to choose an underwear more than buying a shirt or whatever and especially I buy it to be too loose , I guess guys like me knew the reason y 🤪😜😂…so I bought them and on every single day I use to wear one by one as per my cycle chain days and I figured out my lucky underwear , coz that day , I passed my 10th class with good result and I had no idea that I would score that much marks , but I figured out that it happened bcuz of this underwear that I was wearing that day and later I got luckier too bcuz of this my sweet underwear !!😜
And like the cycle chain passes , I get to cross my bad luck underwears too , and tbh , I never throw my lucky underwears nor like burn them like I told earlier that I did to my bad luck underwears 😜😂, tbh , I have this my oldest lucky underwear that has 33 small holes in it and I always wear it till today ….well I know it’s nasty to hear , but whatever right , my stupid beliefs matters to me more than what u think 😜🤥 !!!
So like I said I had my day cycle chain and I get to discover my fuckin underwears and trust me , and the end of each year I burn them into ashes so that no one gets to even touch it after it gets recycled , isn’t that a good habit !!?😜🤪, Cmon man …..so ,on these days when I wore these two underwears that I bought this time , actually it was a pack of 7 and it had two villains with it , and one was I got so much like beaten up and humiliated by one of my seniors ….” jithin “( his name ) in front of my friends and this was a one reason that happened bcuz I wore this blue underwear and another reason was that I used to play soccer so nicely always , and one day I discovered that I didn’t and couldn’t even touch the ball in the ground when we were playing and my mind got messed up and all I did was got so angry!!! and blamed this underwear that I was wearing that day …yah yah I know it’s crazy lame but at those time I had no choice and I was so small enough to fix up my mind in believing these underwears would make up my day ….and I did and I ,still today i do believe in these fuckin shits even though I say them ” fuckin “… but just don’t judge me with these. ….😵😂
Can’t change some of the crazy habits !!! …. isn’t it ???😜
And I later on I met this girl too like once a upon a time , and she too had these beliefs , but on her lipsticks and sock she use to wear , and I felt so satisfied that I was not the one and only guy who felt totally fucked up believing these shits and I gotta a support now. 😚
And now don’t act like , u r Some great Nelson Mandela or a perfect mother Teresa …so fuck up!!! And I’d love to hear if u have such stupid beliefs that make u to decide Ur decisions and make Ur day crazy enough so that u don’t blame yourself and u blame these silly shitty things that made y’all to take these decisions …coz I know not everyone is like me , nor no body is Mr . perfect … right !!?😂📸
So just feel free to share Ur thoughts coz u r with someone who is just like u …so go on …Share it and let me turn on my smile a lil bit like u had while u read mine now 😜…
I just stood there , as I saw the real me facing my own eyes…
I just couldn’t realize that the words that lemme to such stupid beliefs had such powers with them .
But yah , there I stood alone , losing everything in my life .
And this everything included the respect and dignity that blind folded me all these years .
And not that crazy precious gold , for which I fought my entire life giving up my love and family .
Later did I know , that I did the biggest mistake of caring too much , on what people think about me and why ?!
And unknowingly I saw myself as a bad guy , with a good looking eye , and I totally understood y didn’t god make me blind ?, eventhough I actually was , when I looked at myself left with no feelings left over breathing in my heart…
Most of the things that I talk aboutin my blogs , is almost known by all of us , it’s just that when I talk about it , u get to think about it like u have never heard before . If I gotta say in simple words , I’m just a starting key that starts Ur engine…..
With this I would like to open my gate on a related aspects of why ppl get angry ? ; I mean like real tempered anger . Anger for small small things , things that they would have done at a particular age , but when they see someone else doing the same crazy things , they find it irritating and they ask or order or shout at the them to stop .
Y does this happen ? ….. We all did too , we know that when we were kids we too did the same mistake and our parents over reacted , and u wanted support at that time for ur side . But now when u find Ur son or Ur younger youth kids doing the same crazy things that u once did … Y u feel possessed , and trust me , this has nothing to do with that maturity stuff that’s running in ur head currently ! 😂👍
Maturity , hmm… A heavy word right ??? A simple shit word that says us we r responsible now , we are grown up kid and we know how to behave and some shits like this , well….my mom use to say that I was responsible for breaking a glass by mistake when I was five, where I wasn’t matured enough . And I also noticed this till today that only when I break stuff , she scolds me up, but when she break stuff , she blames the table or the floor , that made it happen ….?…. Wtf righ 🤕
Maybe when I become a father or mother , maybe I’ll get a chance like this to break stuff and stand happily blaming stupid tables …..and it looks like I’ll get a chance to smack my kid when he breaks stuff even by mistake …..
What !!!….I can hear u ppl saying ; that this isn’t what is happening here , well ….even if I ask u what is happening over here ??!! , You won’t be able to explain ….it’s not that it’s hard to explain , it’s just a simple concept that you can’t blame urself . And age and timings play there lead role hear , after all we are actors on this world like Shakespeare said ….. aren’t we ?
I wanna share with u ppl , one of my most fuckiest stung up thing in my memory , once I played soccer with my formal dress and I felt down so badly that I got hurt in both my elbows , blood bleeding in my leg , and I came home running , well , I was just studying 4th standard ….so I came running !!! …and when my mom opened the house door as soon as I rang the bell , she reacted in a complete opposite way , of what I thought she would react …all that happened was ,she shouted screaming at my face ; …why did I tear up my pant and my new shirt ….and I was like , mahn …can’t u see ,I’m bleeding ,and for a moment I was like ; r u my mom ?! and once when she tore up her entire dress and got a simple poke in a pin for overreacting suddenly when she saw a cockroach ; all she blamed was that stupid cockroach that ran away from my house that day itself …..😂🤦
Well tbh , my life is messed up in many ways that made me experience so many things ….🤷
Ok , let’s leave all these shits…I wanna talk what I feel to do about this problems solving arena , coz problems are always infinity . The lectures :
Overreacting ……a strong word , with mixed feelings like a sauce . To stop overeacting to mistake that someone does , coz , we also do mistakes knowingly or unknowingly ….
And also never ever take things personally ….the words that a person speaks out of anger ; never mind this words , I mean it !!! , coz it doesn’t hold any meaning other than mixed feelings that a person find hard to Express over long time issues .
Remember , prick !!! Coz even we talk shit and we have also messed up in our lyf , so stop thinking to act like , I’m perfect !!!…coz no one is .
Stop talking !!! ….have u heard of the word ” compromise “. Y not be the first one to keep Ur leg down and give up for someone U love rather than loving Ur ego to hold up Ur neck , ending in divorce .
Especially , fuck misunderstandings and saying ….I need some space …coz we both know that it just only feels good in words for asking space . Naturally, it sucks , and the distance often makes it worse .
If these r all somethings , that u call maturity . Well , u got someone who really respects u…. , rather than finding people to blame for a cockroach that pushed u down. 😂
Stop saying , …..girl , I took it personally … , and separating you and your soul as she …to part away from each other for years and for nothing .
It’s just as simple as to understand as how u speak when u are angry and compromise Ur own self and especially to give up for Ur love . As , if it was u … even u would have spoken in tha same way as she did .
I know, ik …..coz , even I don’t like the word anger , but since some asshole found that we people’s possess angriness , we gotta find a way to deal with it in such a way so that it doesn’t affect our real life and the things we have with us to let it to not go ….
Coz That’s the real concept that we fight with us each and every day .
Those are always the decisions , we take without thinking ; out of our likelihood and if we succeed in it , we think of ourselves as , whatever I do is right coz god’s with me and we continue to do what comes out of it , to believe in choices !!! , and if it goes wrong… , we find someone to blame coz it’s hard to accept that I did the mistakes , when your people who trusts u are looking at u , isn’t it ??!!
The laws of nature , better follow them , don’t try to act in the opposite way , then the nature just makes only simple move , to make u out of its life on how u were born and make Ur lovely partners cry !!!
Sometimes there are no reason why we do some silly things in our life But we do it because , we feel :I gotta do it and I wanna do it.
We are having this type of Motto when we r small as kids , but later , when it comes about the behaviour that we must have as we grow up , we start to hide feelings in us that feels like we dig certain things inside us and bury them with us .
Almost everyone would have experienced this changes as puberty and maturity at some point of life . And I know it feels totally like shit !!!
The problem with this is , it slowly turns up into a beginning trouble , not the stammering problems , the fear to start something or to go to someone and say something thats in our mind or heart ( according to love 😜 ) and dont ask me , being me , a control freak , I messed up shits , especially talking with girls at starting level ,so badly .
Once Idk y but i stammered so hard just to say my name to a girl when she asked me suddenly like there was no questions in this world that was left to answer after all .
And I’ve got insulted too so many times too , and that too very badly 😂
And when I thought about this , I only came to the past of me , who use to speak everything that came into my mind so suddenly , and now me , who is feeling shy for no reasons !
A no. Of feelings mixed questions raised up in my mind linking with my feelings triggering my ego too …that’s make me sentimental , and trust me , u don’t wanna see my cry baby face , it’s so ugly .😳
I seriously waited to talk with this girl , my whole life , and when I got the chance to speak, like finally , suddenly I felt like a bullet , who needs a trigger to make the bullet in me to come out .
I mean , after I get insulted in various points of my lyf , all I use to scream , and that too , when I’m alone , like :
But seriously , at times , I feel like giving a kiss to the guy who found this word ” f*** ” . Coz I don’t know how , but when I say this word ,u know , with full gasp in my mouth , I feel my stress and tension thats inside me , coming out with this word , like totally out of me .
For this feel , I think he deserves a kiss from my side , I don’t know about y’all….. But all that matters is , I feel good !!!
Not only this , various shots that I get , and when I get the feel like , I got lucky ( at the time I got to do something like a role I wished my whole semester) and completely feeling the opposite way when I messed at it throwing a stone in my dream line .
Yah , if u ask me , yah , I discovered some realities in my life , with much experienced insulations .🤦
Also with this ego trigger , I noticed something that’s happening in me like I mostly think about :what people would say or think about me ?
This fuckin question in my mind , and i don’t know how this question landed up in my head , but I started to feel like , I even wear pretty clothes in a thought of going out and thinking about what would be ppl’s opinion on me ?! , when they see me in this dress that I’m gonna wear .
I mean , I really liked the dress at the times of buying it , I stood in one leg for half an hour , washed my father’s car and did all lame shit , and I bought that dress , and after I bought it , I began to think , what would ppl think about me if I wear it around my uncle’s and my cousin’s fuckin eyes(actually the shirt was a bit funnier ), just lemme ask this to myself , where the fuck was I at the time when I hanged myself to get that shirt ?
From where did ” this me ” come from , only at the time , where I got to wear it and not while buying it. y only now ? And y am I so concerned to think of what would ppl think about me ? Ppl , who just pass away on the roadside , y do I think about them ?!!! Coz I’m not even sure that they would even see my face , then y am I thinking about my shitty shirt …..
And after a much debate with myself standing in front of my mirror talking to myself like a fool ( and once my sister saw and she asked me at dinner , do u love someone?? , I mean that crazy…. )
For this maturity stuff , yah I turned mature and yah I must be responsible , a big fine !!! Ok done. But y have I turned into something that cares about others whom I even don’t know , to let judge me , more than me .
Knowing that it makes me to decline to something I was waiting for my whole lifetime to achieve it and to experience it , I think I gotta say , fuck me , now …
Coz all I did was dying to achieve it and then let my ego to carve it unknowingly and feeling worried for y had I wanted to want it in the first place . ( The stupid brain …right ? )
I know life could be so complicated , but to me it looks like , this all just ends up making me to get insulted in the name of maturity or to shout ” fuck ” as loud as possible making out my stress trigger my anger and getting my leg injured by kicking some street lamp so hard , that I end up in hospital saying I got Corona when I touched to kick the lamp by some asshole doctors making my ego die completely here . 😂 #indianPolitics
All I understood , was to be myself at the end of the drowning boat where I stood alone like a person who acted being too good in life and died for nothing !!!.
we meet so many ppl daily , in work place , while eating in a restaurant , while waiting for red signal to cross a road , and we come upon so many ppl ,whom we meet day to day .
With some ppl we might feel like we belong , but we maintain a distance with em coz we really don’t know about them and stuff .
And if conditions are possible ,we meet them every day , start a wonderful relationship with them , love them , fight with them ,even sometimes I share my pain with my friends , and the friendship gives a form of relationship that we don’t get with even with our family , even though Ur dad behaves friendly , we only feel like sharing some personal stuff only with our real time friends , who give us memories that we later ;when we move on in life , we turn back and laugh , thinking at them .
With conditions of life , and our future , we move on leaving our close friends , and the distance part us away , and at times I feel happy as we r not in 1980’s , we got video call and we maintain our friendship status and I know that long distance friendships and relationships feels really good !!!
My only wish is to Make this day a wonderful moment , talking with all my friends in group chat and share our feelings on how much we miss each other .
I would like to make a wish , to me and my set of friends ; coz yah mayb today we r far from each other , but I always pray that we stay together in future when we got kids and family , in near by houses and we all work in a same company , a company full of my friends , doesn’t that sound interesting !!! , To be together forever from then .
Coz it’s proved to be always true from proverbs, that even if Ur wife or husband goes away leaving u, a person doesn’t feel bad that much as he feels when his best friend parts away from his life going long distance from each other .
I would like to know on how u feel on this day , being apart from Ur best friend whom u love the most ??
Do like, comment and share with Ur friends and make this day , the friendship day colourful .🔆
A life without any problems !! Wow …. doesn’t it seems exciting and at the same time interesting to hear ?
Yah ,That’s what I said , doesn’t it seems so fascinating and very coolish feeling to hear it , itself ? , OR are you just saying , it’s just only good to hear it from people’s saying this ?, coz … Obviously when u say it , your feelings on how u say it would be completely unhappy .
So welcome viewers ….
It’s me Nabeel , just giving a gate entry before the jump off into the middle of the ocean and yah do follow me on wordpress and on Instagram if u really like my words and I’m totally sorry , coz I fix my writing schedule like one day I write and one day Break ….
So thanks for Ur patience and support ❤️ and I’m really glad u people read what I write and not just press the like button simply .
Ok … enough f***ing around ..let’s goo…..
Doesn’t all the words around us feel complicated coz we just simply say it without thinking , in some anger or whatever , but later , when we think about the mess we have created , why do we feel so fucked up ? ,
It’s ok , we did shit and fine , but we must move on right !!, why do we think at night about the bad stuff thing that we did today completely without thinking .
Ok , so without thinking …hmm , great word ,huh!! , very useful for self defense these days like idk , I just did it ,I was not in a good mood etc etc . Just an escape words that doesn’t really have a meaning to it .
So I would just like to ask one thing with the start , who speaks at these times especially when we feel, hey I didn’t talk that shit at that time!? , so this person inside me ,who comes out without thinking , acts In some stupid way , mostly ending up creating problems and making us think and worry about it at all night holding our innocent pillows ( who didn’t do anything ) so tightly !!!
I don’t know whether you guys would have noticed some things or what , but u specifically know about this that I’m gonna say that we always do is the reason behind all this shit…
We are not the same , right?… both inside the house or inside your room and outside in the real world …we different .. ain’t it? , the things that we do when we know that it’s only me who’s alone in this place …like dancing in front of your mirror without underwear and a lot more etc etc…😜, That kind of things I’m talking about . The things . And mostly we don’t do any of those crazy things when we r around our parents or outside and stuff and trust me , everyone is so confidential about it that we don’t do this stupid stuff except when we r alone .
But there are some unknown stuff that everyone do when we get hit by ego’s brother Mr.Temper , and even I can’t control myself and it’s us who speaks some shitty words out of anger and do something like reacting out , giving life to the word ATTITUDE .
And to be frank , attitude doesn’t reveal any of Ur those confidential crazy stuff that we only do when we r alone , unless you are emotionally weak ; But still we act out like some third person is making us do shit without me unknowing of what I’m doing to myself !!!
And there u land up like a 100% sure concept from my side like imagining about what u say at that time like” can’t I have a life without any fuckin problems , so that i don’t mess up ??!! “
Well , a simple answer is no . And u know it too . But we just simply wanna ask it to ourselves like we feel god is sitting up in your mindand listening to us , and like I said acting out . , but anyways the answer is a big Noooooo ……
If u r Saying , you are a big fan of : ” how to live life without problems ” and doing too much research about it . well , then I think I have to say u y it happens coZ, I don’t want u to feel incomplete like always .
I would like to finish off with a simple question itself for this huge problem .
Like I always say in my other blogs , its just the fault in the basics that our parents fail to teach us in our childhood , and if u know the solutions about these issues that I’m taking about , then I can guarantee that u r really cool !!!
A simple question ..
If there is no problems in lyf , no …. nothing and anything . Lemme ask u this : from where will the happiness arise ? , because at end of each problems, is where u get an extraordinary happiness that u don’t consider it to be like that , but yah , (the psycology) , nobody sees it that way . And one more , what will u do , if u have no problems in Ur lyf ?, I mean y do you earn money ? It’s coz u have a problem that u can’t buy anything that u wanna buy , y do u brush up …coz u gotta a problem of keeping yourself clean . I mean , how can u just say ,…u need a lyf without any problems for just satisfying nobody but Ur ego .
It doesn’t make any sense , coz if u got no problems , y do u need that brain ? that thinks about it and finally bringing an unknown joy at the results of it .
Statistically , it’s measured that problems are the reason why we live the lyf in this world from which we were born , coz it doesn’t matter u r rich or poor , u always got problems that makes u to survive for what is Tomorrow..right .
Just an unknown cycle of nature that doesn’t triggers to catch up the knowledge with our minds , that simply doesn’t thinks before , we ask for something that’s simply impossible : howto live a lyf without any problems !!!
Well , u can’t …..😂
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All They keep on saying !!!…. From my parents who brought me to this world ; from the teacher , who brought the real knowing about real me to this beautiful world . And all they thought me was don’t lie !!! And not to lie .
But isn’t the lie , an impossible complex word , coz sometimes I notice the people who told me not to lie , lie in front of my eyes , and when i asked them y did u lie ?? They just laughed as if they won a medal and they say , i lied for a good thing !!!
Then lemme ask u this, y did u teach me , only : not to lie and not to : lie , for a good reason .
By calling themselves dad and mom , they partially think they teach us/me only the good stuff , by not knowing the curiosity in me !!!, that’s waiting to know the bad stuff , once they don’t watch me ,and they manage Their own answers by saying and transforming their good or bad act into something that we wanna hear as a kid .
And they just beat and heat us and not them when they do it , for me, saying a simple lie In my small age , but they not knowing that they failed in the attempt to teach me that : yah , u could lie , but for a great good cause !!!.
If they would have thought to me like this way, maybe my curiosity of what would happen if I lie wouldn’t be waiting out to act in such a way that this world calls it as ” the mistake “, for a simple lie .
So lemme ask u again , was it me? , who didn’t teach me “a lie” or was it the people who taught me what was a lie , so that I just lie and not lie for a good cause such that two families don’t tear apart for such funny words we talk .
A lie ,
I looked deep down standing 6 foot tall today to my past childhood , and all I found was the mistakes on my basics , that today marks me as a bad guy who does mistakes that they call it and no body seems to stand up for me to take the blame , which should be taken by the people who brought me up and who taught me that it what was just a lie , and y shouldn’t I lie . ???
They thought by Ur dreams that I would grow up to be a good guy , a perfect guy , that they weren’t , but how could I be ….if u grow me up in the same way that they grew up , by just teaching me the basics in the same wrong way to just not to lie , and not saying y shouldn’t I lie and when should I lie ….
U grew me up to be a good boy , making me learn good things , u taught me so much interests in only the good stuff that u TOTALLY forgot about the eagerness that I would have for learning the bad things by not thinking about the future ,that I go out of our house to the reality bad world as soon as you teach me the next mistake of Ur parenting good of “how to walk !!! “
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Isn’t it !!! , don’t we all wanna be famous in our lives? , and isn’t it a main reason y we work hard in life ?, in a feeling running away in our minds THAT ONE DAY WE’LL BECOME FAMOUS EXCELLING IN OUR INTERESTS !!! That we work for every day .
Ok , well , that’s really cool on what u think , but lemme put in another way of how things appear . Just imagine, What if u r really famous now and u got a lot of fans around u , and yah for some days , u really feel excited about it and u enjoy on how ppl like u and the way u feel like u r their king and they serve u .
So everything is cool , u got money , u got fans , u got watever in the world u want to be yours , but u slowly discover that u r missing out something that’s really important in lyf , the privacy , the loneliness u want to feel at sometime , the freedom to go out and choose Ur favourite biscuits in a supermarket like a normal guy and u come to a state , where u mostly miss out the Audience side and u feel like u r the only person , who is fit to appear only on the screen and not in a seat of a cinema hall !!!
We mostly regret , whatever I say now , coz u ain’t that famous guy who is so depressed and stressed about his expensive life , the fear that gets into his/her mind that Thinks : will be my privacy leaked up somewhere by some photography assholes who clicks pics all the time they come out even simply to buy a coffee or something ; the struggle that they face on reacting to how the public or the fans think about them ,and making u make changes for them !!! Controlling everything , ur diet till what u wear for the unknown fans in a confusion of what they may like . Lemme be straight , will any of a famous celebrity really value his fan if they meet his fan away from a camera and a public screen ,who is watching him on making us this aww!! what’ll my love ( my celebrity ) will do to his fans ??
The answer would be a 100 % ” NO ” , even, if it were us at that hot place taking care of Ur mental stress at running in search of privacy every day , we would act the same , (results speaking on complete info strategies )
A static report says , 76 percentage of celebrity or famous ppl always have a practise of going to a psycatrist . And for this I got only one question asking at u standing at the end of the road where u marked it as ,” u became successful in Ur lyf ” , and all I wanna ask over here is , WHAT ARE WE RUNNING FOR ?? Cheating ourselves .
Coz ultimately it’s made to blv that ppl who don’t have money and people who live in a poor farm family life , have a happy life and apart from this , every one of us are just faking up our real life and smile .
I mean , I don’t know , how u feeling after I shared with u all these current goin information that’s running around in the world which is so amusingly the reality, but I got one thing that’s ticking up ma brains that I gotta share, as all we word hard is to excel on whatever we do and become famous in our small life’s and all the famous celebrities do is wish and pray whether they get to go back in their life to the life like once they were audiences and watch the match among the crowd together peacefully with their hard earned money in their hand!!!
So it’s just the Reverse psychology that we are running to become from nothing to something and the successful people wishing to become from something to nothing .
If I got to be honest with me , I gotta share a way too right, giving up u Answers, coz I don’t want u guy’s to feel puzzled stuck up , what to do : coz the reality of the world wide things that’s going around certifies us to console that , All we live in this world and fight with ourselves crying each and every day holding the soft pillow at night imagining about your rough day is to expect From ourselves a simple thing that won’t we get a day at the last day of our life to live and die happy and peacefully !!!
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I don’t know how ,but most of us are disturbed and we feel lonely like we miss out something that’s really unknown by us ,especially in this quarentine time , and we wanna describe our feelings on how we feel , to others like , I’m not in mood to talk to people nowadays , I’m feeling miserable and stuff u say something like that , and most of the ppl say lonely like I’m feeling lonely !!! And u try to satisfy the pain in u by accepting something that u believe in , that others might take care of Ur talks and think about it , but in reality , mostly people pity u in this situation after asking u to share Ur problems one or more time , but if u regret to say the matters stuck in Ur head , it just turns out Making them to just say you to MOVE ON from that shit or some stuff that’s irritating the person who is in pain at that very moment .
Which brings me to my very topic over here ,
The person who is hearing this and the person who say you to move on for nothing that he knows of ,but most of us listen at the time of pain to him or her ,trust me (the laws of nature ) , cuz sentimentally we just want to hear some satisfying words that is making u to go with it , without even thinking about to whom u told , or whether u told to him about your problems or wat !!!! But we just listen to them in most cases .
There is a whole lot difference over here , coz the person, the speaker ,who is saying u over here to move on , is so casually Saying u to move on , and this is totally out of the pityness, totally!!! like I said , coz we never share our personal problems mostly with others as we feel we can solve them in most conditions , and when he/she says some words that is something u really wanna hear , we just blindly accept it , without knowing that what is he saying for and about?
Secondly and most important , the listener , you ! , We most normally , we got flashbacks and sorrows that worry us , and now u totally forget that u r in pain and like I said , the words that satisfies your mentality at specific times , and u end up in total mess , forgetting the little basic knowledge that when we always say people to promise us when we say them our secrets coz u can’t keep up the promise that u made to urself , fixing up a particular phrase as a secret .
So I purely get Ur mind voice that’s saying it’s who me , who started my race and I gotta finish it somehow to prove myself , and these basics that we ppl mostly fail to understand that the root of a problem is definitely a reason to y we land on such stupid problems and stress ourselves for nothing , but for later regret to realise about something u regard that u were the root for the big green tree that grew now so angrily out of Ur own self !!!
Dude , peace out !!!
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I never knew y god wanted us to meet each other and make us fall in love ,
And when I thought all was going good and everything was fine between us ; IT WASN’T , and when I thought it wasn’t , you said looking into my eyes ,IT WAS !!!
Till today I think of you everyday from the first day I met u , and I just noticed that the last moment with u keeps flashing in my head Again -and – again .
And when I looked into it ,I still remember , that we both didn’t want us to see each other even though we wanted .
And didn’t know y , when I see in my mirror everyday, the moments ,you spoke to me with anger and left saying , that I deserved someone better , and then you turned back and walked away crying like in a waywhere I couldn’t see you !!!
All I did was respect the place where u left me everyday going at sitting there for hours like an asshole . Coz that was all I could do ,babe, I was no SUPER HERO.
One day ….
I totally , broke up when I heard u moved on with a guy , and when I found him giving up my lyf and he casually started to talk to me by saying :
” Mahn , I don’t know y she’s intrsted in me so much , but I’m damn sure she loves me so hard just to forget you !!!” And suddenly, I didn’t know what happened to me , but ……
At that very moment was where I really lost myself and not at the time where she left me saying that I deserved someone better than her .
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At times , when u are talking about something in a conversation , you suddenly notice that u land on a different kind of topic that is different from the topic u started to talk about , I guess everyone would have noticed this change ,we think this simply happens when friends talk with each other in a group or girl talks are always like this that make this happen , but mostly no! , Just check out what I’m saying : When we talk we suddenly give power to a particular word in our sentence while talking and the whole sentence that is Ur figure of speech concentrates the particular word (that u feel to call it as particular) and the whole talk that u where talking about something , changes automatically without even noticing with realisation ,even if hundreds of people are talking with each other .
That makes us to Coming across giving power to words that controls a whole conversation without even knowing by the whole group who is participating in the talk , Likeeverything is happening in front of them without knowing except the one who knows the concept of giving power on the group .
Nowadays it’s so easy , people believe anybody and everybody who looks smart enough and match themselves, and they say good people are bad and bad are good according to the point of view of how they see him /her and when , the situation and the metaphor of choosing words that give power to the whole scenario , that makes them take sudden decisions and suffer later.
Whatever I say now might be a bit confusing , but u’ll remember this blog when u r in a scene , and u feel like the guy or girl ahead of u is winning a conversation and everyone is thinking that whatever she is saying is right ( u must know this , that unknowingly without even knowing , that girls automatically drag attention according to psychology ) and here whatever u say is wrong and u look like a bad guy to urself too in a wide range of public that u r exposed , standing there , thinking what to say ,to make you look like the good guy and I’m 100 % sure , that is complete waste of realising it then , coz anyway u’ll lose the conversation bcoz of ego and the confidence u see on the opponents eye that makes him feel like he is under confidence and support by the public standing around u both .
So if u wanna know all these simple basic trigger of a big gun , without humiliation and losing out Ur respect in public that makes u urself look like a bad villain in front of everyone , well , then I can guarantee u , you r reading in the right blog .
I don’t know whether u have noticed this , but mostly in a conversation or an argument , the person who finishes the entire argument with his last sentence draws people attraction to him unknowingly , like I said all of this is something that even I can’t understand when I’m in between of a conversation between me and someone , but when I think about it later , I get y my opponent person got attraction and support from others , those who were not his friends , and trust me , I’ve got fucked up in conversations and got insulted so many times in front of public , that made to think about the situations I was in again and again, and I found out that in most cases eventhough in middle of the conversation it looks like I had the conversation on my hands , but at the end HE WINS !!! That made me frequently think each lines of what he spoke again and again ,and I saw that the last sentence of a conversation that he speaks so loudly with a reasonable questioning end on his finishing line , that draws up all the attention and locks up my mouth like I can’t defend on his last line , coz most of my reasonable lines I used them in middle of the conversation of an argument and the end mattered to the public on how my opponent ended the argument , not the middle part where I spoke so reasonable .( The nature of a argument that no one can change even if u were there between the public hearing the conversation . )
And even though he knew he was the bad guy over there , the words he chose gave him the power to think like , hey ! I don’t think what I did at that time was that wrong by the words power and the public support who blindly focussed on the conversation on how it ended .
And to be frank , that was the last conversation I lost till today .
Also ,I learned that people talk so much while going before a fight , even me !!! But when we r exposed and in that situation of the fight on reality, we don’t do anything like we talked so much before , I understood maybe everything I was talking was a joke except the reality where I was struggling to face the real me , whom I didn’t feel when I was in the middle of the fight , I felt like he came only when I talked so much , That I would kick him , fuck him , but I laughing noticing that the real me who must be with me when I was in the reality on not in talks , And to this doubt my gut shut my mouth by saying , he went on a vacation .
Andthere i was again standing insulted after the fight was over .
Controlling the topic of public without making themknow has become very easy for me nowadays and the bad me says to take advantage out of it with people who hurted me . But no I didn’t ,and later when I thought about these , I learned to forgive from somewhere behind in past when I also came to about these some secrets of the giving power to the words , That roamed in my head .
U won’t believe me , if I say that I used to stammer a lot in my childhood and people use to laugh at me , no one told me a way out of it (my parents took me to a psycatrist like guy , but he was of no use , coz later I understood , the change only happens only when I get to understand it myself ), and I was standing there alone , losing my self respect each day , or what would happen , if u can’t even say Ur own name properly and u stammered to say that too 😭 , yah I cried for days about my this me , but like I have told earlier , too much pain , makes u too much stronger ,and I knew that’s dangerous too and I understood that I was giving my focus and attention on particular word (stammering) that runs in my brain when I was about to talk something with my mouth , and I myself found that I’m giving a unnecessary power to this word that is fixed on my head like a virus unknowingly and working this out for days , I found myself out of this big trouble of my life ( this is actually a big troubled story of my life that I was facing and God alone knows the amount of me I spend in this to come out of it , and if u ppl are really interested to hear about this part of my insulted life , lemme know in my comments )and thus by god’s grace I can talk in public much better than people who could talk normally to each other from childhood but if u see people closely nowadays they don’t talk in public due to fear and now I laugh at em And I totally know how it feels when ppl are laughing at it pain and yah I do regret it , but at some point UK u can’t control urself .
My childhood is so horrible , but thanks to Mr . Horrible coz it made me stronger than others and made me to see things differently that couldn’t be seen and felt by me if I was a normal person like everybody.
Some of the most dangerous words are always known by u , like for example U SAY ADDICTION, u mainly give power to this word in the sentence when u say u have with u and through this u can find ways to work this out ,but most commonly for any word when u talk about them in ur statement of conversation , just trust me blindly here , u’ll get it where u r stuck up with urself if u read this blog till here .
And I hope , I was able to benefit with some valuable information that can entirely change the very u , you feel like u don’t like urself to someone excitingly awesome if u really take initiative on follow whatever I told at the moment where u feel like u r dealing with reality .
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I know everyone of u have a different past , everyone might have a awesome stories which has both happy and sad endings .
Mostly people don’t share the happy feelings outside coz mostly u feel excited and u wanna keep it to urself and experience it to the fullest . Well ,then what about the sad feelings ??? , Maybe the one of the tight reasons ,why we all landed here in WordPress , advicing and motivating all the people we can find , and to all the people we could reach as possible and that is what we literally want !!! , We want everyone to hear us , what we have gone through inside of our box to which we fight everyday standing in front of the mirror like an idiot , but really are we idiots ???
Coz sometimes we all are crazy and we can’t help it . It happens .
Hey , we mess up , it is normal , but understand , it is normal . If everyone of us could be a winner , y does a word called loser is created , remember we feel like we lose all the time , but we get a unknown knowledge called learning from it, everytime when u feel like u r touching the ground in the word I lost . But we also know that I would talk like this in order to motivate u , so that u would actually listen and read to my this motivational talks that I’m doing now in the form of words . But maybe u r wrong , no I’m not , coz ppl won’t say the things they do , then there would be no interest in it right ??!
Ok , lemme ask one thing , how many of us follow the things we read , i mean it . I’m not asking ARE U FOLLOWING EVERYTHING THAT PPL ADVICE TO FOLLOW ….NO !!! , I’m talking about the things u need , the things u think and feel I should follow this ,in order to get out of my depression and anxiety stuff , the decisions u take to follow something’s so personally when u read like the stuffs about fitness , now don’t say , that I’ve NVR wanted this !!! THROW OUT UR EGO , come to the reality !!! Come back to someone u see everyday in the mirror , come back to u , say bye to ego for a moment now . I’m just asking a simple question !, Are we having a interest of following everything we decide to see and follow about it like the amount of intrst we have at the time of reading , mostly the answer is No !!! , Including me , like I said throw out the EGO , I’m here in WordPress coz I feel bad about myself , I feel like there is no one to love me , I’m in search of love , I so have a very stressful past ( those who have read my past blog , would understand ) But look, WHAT AM I DOING , eventhough I ain’t perfect , I’m ready to advice and motivate people , coz that is what I’m doing ; and that is what I want for my satisfactional me .
I want u to ask Urself , R u perfect ? Do u follow the things that u decide to follow ….and then forget about it and land up at a question y did I read about it ?. But idk y , I noticed ,we all want to write , we all want someone to hear us , we want someone to hear us in such a way that we want them to understand that this is what we r doing , ik that obviously u’ll offend me , but someone has to talk the REALITY right . We all write motivational topics , so that someone benefits from us , from the bad stuff we’ve been through , from the bad stuffs that has happen to us and we r preventing other people from something bad taht happened to us .
I say :Everything we r doing is perfect !!!.
But what about the listening side . Yo ?!!! , Everyone wants to motivate and advice ppl !!!….it’s good . I really appreciate the effort u take . But what about the listening ?? Who is listening to us is what we r fighting for …. If we lose the concept of what we are fighting for. I’m like what’s the point . Like I said WE WANT SOMEONE TO HEAR US , and after getting likes and followers , if that isn’t Ur concept and u say u changed ….mahn !!! I will ask u ask u strongly , what were u fighting for in Ur own past , Why only me * won’t you people ask him???
If u r Some one who says , I listen and I follow without fail , then it’s ok , bcuz that is the purpose of WordPress ( now don’t act like a good boy and change to good sides ) , the concept we keep is we must reach people to benefit them, not to make them just to like our blogs , we need to wake up them from their bad dreams , to help them find solutions through our words , this is what we are !!! This is why we come here , write what we have been through and this is why we feel belonged here as a one community with same interests .
Nobody of us is a writer or an author over here , we read and we write , bcuz like I said atlast it comes to a single basic concept of what we are fighting for with ourselves , making us want people to listen our part of the story .
Lemme be frank over here , I hated when I started writing here at wordpress , coz people without even reading my blogs , they like my blogs , I was like what is happening ??, mahn this is not Instagram or Facebook , like this is not somewhere where we come to like pictures , this is somewhere where we come to read ourself in form of other souls who write about their hobbies and mostly what they have went through .
Like they say that’s what she said !!! We haven’t landed to this arena on wordpress coz people have joined here , we all get United coz this is the free space we get to share our personal life with the similar people who have got their worst past , so this is like we chose it neither like we didn’t land up here . Trust me ! , I’ve spoken with people who make time out of their busy lives to come to wordpress and write about their life , just to write !, so that people benefit from them each day .
So like I said , the concept is so important , with time ; maybe the past of what we came for could change , but not y we came for !!! Then it would rise up a question when u stand in front of the mirror asking yourself WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ??!!
….., be careful , know what u r doing , coz thats the most important stuff of today’s reality , the reality is most of us including me can’t talk all the things I told with words in front of people , words help me to reach what I have to and want to say . And I’m so thankful to wordpress like sites giving the chance to make people listen and feel the things we say through words .
Similarly ,Nowadays the mental health issues are the most complicated cases that more and more people are getting stuck into and choosing a wrong path without even knowing what is happening around em .
Don’t we feel sick and emotional and don’t we leave tears , when we see some people who are struggling to drink water with their hands , who are fighting with their lives to survive in this world , unlike us .
So when we compare our problems for which we are writing here with such sorrows running in our heart with those people fighting with their lives to survive , we are nothing in front of em , we can’t even compare ourselves to even a dust particle , when it comes to such problems and situations they r on . I mean like how do u feel if u can’t cry and express Ur pain , eventhough u want to and u can’t , I mean Like how can one process that kind of pain which is not allowed to be expressed by our own body .
There are still so much worst conditions where we start crying when we see them itself , the kind of suffering that people face to the primary goal of survival in this pity earth is the punishing environment we face in a different reality, where no one has a guarantee card when will we die but still we wanna live .
Ask yourself !!! , If one time is not enough , ask twice till u understand , “R WE WORTH IT .” coz we r always thankful to someone who created us with these light pain that just bought us here to WordPress like sites to share our pain , coz here u got nothing to lose like the people who can’t even describe their pain , coz they can’t speak and doesn’t have hands to type EVEN their sorrows as words . What do u call this ….pity ?
Which brings on the basics as Saying thanks and sorry’s which aren’t just enough in this complicated life to be happy and satisfied by our own ego, u got to be always thankful to God and other people who made ur sorrows to just appear in words and not something more in real pain .
Because like just as I said , except this Corona , there are somany possibilities of getting cured with physical illness through medicines and stuff , but this mental illness is something that doesn’t have any medicinal cure, and which is very dangerous too , making a persons life to change to upsidedown from some real reality were he was OK , that some scholars say that the reason behind all these dangerous illness are simple basic concepts that makes a person’s mind to take a wrong path IN SIMPLE DECISION MAKINGS and make him land up on streets for years unknowing what he’s doing to himself itself , in which I was talking about one of a serious topic in it from up till all this time ,that was read by u saying : Always know what u r doing ,and for what u r doing , that made u to start to do it always from nothing .
Like every other normal people wondering around this world , you meet a new face of a girl or a boy when u go places to study , work and in many unexpected awkward moment or ways, that mostly happens to b unexpectedly unknown and u meet a new face that u feel to be belonged like u NVR felt with anyone and if u stay connected with them like once in almost every week, like often u get a chance to meet em , then mostly u end up in a rounded drugged circle called love .
Like u know how Taj Mahal got built up with a simple word love, I too had a crazy love story , which I wanna forget but it’s dug deep in my heart , that rises me questions , how can u bury up something that’s already buried to b dead.
To b fair , my love story and this memory reeled only for 7 months or so , but due to the situations on my relationship ended, it had a severe impact on how it lasts in my heart without melting as a memory .
Argh, I think I’m fuckin up giving introductions around right!!! , let’s get into my unforgettable pin .
My unexpected love actually started up with a girl who was travelling with me to school in our bus and it was since 8 years she was travelling with me from everyone’s home or bus stop and I NVR felt love for her even once until then the very moment of the year, actually it’s like it takes 2 and a half-hour to reach our school from my town to main city and again 2 and a half-hour to reach home from school , so yah I had a lot of time to and fro in between traveling .
Here first I had a crush on someone first , then it turned out to be my child love , and I didn’t take it seriously ; in the mid of my 10 th class , like once in everyday we had a normal day , and I was actually 30 min past of getting down from my stop and I felt like someone is watching me ,
First I thought it was my delusion and I left it , but after some minutes later too , I felt like someones eyes r crossing my eyes frequently ( like I used to see through the window of my bus often both right and left ) and I stopped my running brain and turned on the screenshots of my eyes , and yah it was what u thought , A girl who was my ex- crushes friend was looking at me with a glittering eyes and a spark in her small smile .
And I was like suddenly what is happening ?, like 1000 of questions raised up in my head , won’t it ? , I ignored all those questions and first to make sure that she was looking at me , I looked at My back seats and to be crazy sure , I looked beneath the seats like some rats are hiding and pranking me .
So after I made sure , I confirmed it was me and totally confirmed when that girl bent down to see what I was doing like a garbage picker and she laughed very very lightly when she realised that I was hiding from her (mayb the way she understood what I was doing).
Finally as I said , it was the bachelor Me , eventhough I felt happy I was someone’s crush , but I can’t say a true happy but a feared happiness coz I wasn’t sure y she saw me , and slowly I tried to make contact with my eyes with her like Bluetooth , and it felt like I had ice in top of my eyes , coz obviously it was a new feeling when u come to know someone was interested in u ,like I said , u don’t need to know y they love u , but they just lovingly feel like their eyes belongs with them while looking at u and mostly this doesn’t happen with every one.
To be sad , I didn’t make any move at that time , I just saw her 3 to 4 times like I see my favourite butter chicken in fondness and she and I left , when the bus stopped in our bus stops .
From the very next day, I don’t know the fuckin y , but I felt like mahn , I gotta go school , so get up from Ur damn sleep !!! ( Don’t say u NVR did all these if u had a perfect attendance in school ) and today I felt like I understood the meaning of y my parents say me to go to school like a good boy .
, I was waiting for my bus and usually my bus is like it has only one door in the front of the bus driver and we have to go through the first seat to our last back seats where we boys sit , actually to be fair , my bus had a special arrangements like the girls use to sit from the half front of the bus and we boys in the half back , (this bus arrangements was done by a teacher who used to go in our bus once and since we had too many parties in our bus , once by mistake , a full bottle of coke fell from her face to her entire body and she scolded that so a lot to the transport facilities and to the parents of guys who threw the drinks in bus , and later when she realised that there was no security measures taken from her complaint , she left our bus and began to come to school in her private car , and there was no one to control us in the bus to not to talk to girls and stuffs after that .
And yah for your ppl FYI , we never had a co education study with boys and girls , coz we study in Saudi and combination of girl’s and boy’s education is strictly prohibited , so u can understand the value of the fun we have in the bus time that is 2 and a half-hour only.
So the next day , like I said I felt like a good boy feeling like my responsibilities of liking to go to school and like I said we enter through the bus front door and , the girl who saw me yesterday used to sit in the front first seat with my ex crush , and there i was entering the bus with my right foot, she gave the first romantic look (that’s what I called it ) coz that was the first look which she gave me after me knowing that she was interested in me , and this things got stored in my sd memory card of my brain to make the storage space empty . Till today too I feel my body’s shivering when I think about how she saw me !!!
And tbh , I was gonna fall from the bus itself like I saw a shining star that had golden eyes on that pleasant morning and through the steps I climbed the stairs of my bus and went to my seat , and that day Idk y , but I felt like everything was new , the way I think ,the way I use to act crazy , the way I speak , I felt like I wanna change everything that makes me silly and yah later on I did !!! But i felt something new inspite of the love that my mom shows to me through her scoldings and my dad through his advices and too much care , and this was something new that u NVR ever got and I liked it when a unknown girl showed it to me .
Days passed on like this and we kept on seeing through different angles , different eye reaction , different form of smiles until one of my best friend (who loves my ex crush , actually this is a long story , actually I was about to ask my ex crush whether she likes me or what but then I found that my best friend loved her too much , so I left my interest on her and she too felt belonged with him , so I was happy , trust me , I was someone who will do anything for my friends , if anyone of us feels like something is creating ego trouble between us , one of us gives up and I’m always thankful to God that I have such great friends .
So bcuz of this bff idiot , one day while I was looking at her , he suddenly mentioned to his and my ex crush like how can a tall guy and a normal height girl whom I look kisseach other ? (And yah I’m tall 😝) ,actually he just told for a fun but she took it srsly and he and me were staring and each other and blinking at each other eyes like we did something wrong , and I didn’t know what happened , but suddenly she stopped looking me the entire day , and my idiot friend was very sorry for nothing and asked me , mayb she loves me or what ??!!!And obviously I had no idea .
And the next day , while entering the bus , I didn’t see her , and I was afraid like I did something wrong or watever and while coming back from school in our way , correctly at exact last 30 min of my stop , she asked me whether I liked her or what?? And at that times none of my friends were there in my bus , coz I’m my last bus stop and her stop was behind me .
And till today I have doubt like I got an extra mouth somewhere in my face or what , bcoz someone from my side told that day yes!! For her question and that too suddenly and I didn’t know how I sweated too much eventhough my bus is totally air-conditioned .
And yah , from the day we officially accepted each other , things started going well and lovely and we used to talk a lot through signs and tbh , I learned how to talked Hindi from her and more fluently from talking with my friends.
All was good and awesome until one day , where she had to come through her car to school and not in my bus from that day due to her cousins and their exams with whom she use to live ( fyi she doesn’t have parents coz they died in a accident and she often gets upset for that and cries and till today I remember her in my prayers for her good lyf and u can say that’s y I left my relationship with her coz I ain’t felt that I’m a good vibe to handle her in my life .)
Since everyday she came in car from that day onwards , and the bus felt too lonely for my eyes eventhough I have a big group of friends playing rummy and games with me in my bus , and ig ten days passed and the month of Ramadan started( where we use to fast and give more importance to our religion beliefs like performing prayers without fail and stuff) and days passed on without her and our exams were about to start and I was hard on my preparations to convert her missing concentrations to something else .
And suddenly one day though !!!,I found a letter on my bus seat that made me feel like I was a spy ; but later I came to know that through my ex crush and her small cousin brothers she started sending letters to me and I was like wow !!! Y didn’t I think of this way to talk to her? (actually it was like some girls use to talk about me in bus and I use to be very active), and now that I’m depressed and that they knew y , through somehow it would have reached her ears and she started with letter writings to me and after her 2nd letter reached me , she asked me to talk with words if possible and she said she knows that I miss her too much and she wants me to write to her , ( anyway I was gonna write to her nigga ! ) and we started to write and yah it was a new feeling of my life that I could never forget , I learned the patience of waiting for a letter to my questions I asked her through words and I felt like I was in love with a girl of 1950’s and tbh , mahn ! It was damn good , the waiting for one letter and that too in exam times , the eagerness!!! . It was not a love of kisses or anything that makes our interest take over advantages that’s mostly common to a relationship nowadays,but it was something I called simply-special🖤
And I used to keep all my letters, ig till then it was more than 15 letters from her (then), under my bus seat that was removable mostly bcuz I can’t take them to home or I might land up getting caught by my mom or whatever ; One day evening ; I didn’t get any letter from her! and I was like mayb she might have some work and she would have not written to me due to situations , I came to this thought , as my ex crush told me and she was the one who helped pass the letters to and from me so I had to blv her , but I turned furious when I came to know that my old letters that I use to keep under my seats were missing the particular day , I searched almost all the seats that day , but I landed up in bad luck and I didn’t get em and I ended up getting hurt in my right foot kicking up a street lamp that day in anger .
Days passed , and alhamdulillah the fasting was going fine, and from that day onwards I stored all my letters in the lower back of my school bag so that I didn’t get up caught in home and don’t miss em as well.
In between all these things , I and her planned on to come to a place near her home during taraviya prayer (a spcl prayer in the month of Ramadan that takes too long to finish )and meet her through her house balcony like window in her home .(mostly ik it’s like a fairy tail , that’s y I can’t forget her till today , all the things with her were so much romantic that I can’t move up on the memories of her ,and when I think about all these , I often end up on beautiful smile in my lame face )
So with my best friend and my group support , somehow we managed to come out of prayers as soon as possible by praying it fast (which is actually so wrong thing to do and obviously I regret my behaviour of giving more importance to see a girl more than a compulsory prayer that is meant to be attended by us srsly with concentration. )well, I realized this later , so whatever 😝
with help of my friends we managed to reach her house and that too we had plenty of time for the prayer to get over and return to our home and it was really a good time with my friends and I have to say this , if I was given a option of choosing between a million dollars and my friends , I’d choose my friends twice ,mahn they were the one’s who proved that time could be spent in such Awsm ways without even knowing that I was with them playing and talking my entireLife .
Like I planned in words with her , we were about to meet at 9:00 pm , and there i was with 5 of my friends who prayed with me in masjid with my best friend too , so we went to her home with shivering and talking about what would happen if we get caught with her brothers , like she said , we were sure that none of her cousins parents would be there but not her two big brothers of whom me and my whole group was afraid of , coz they were too aged and obviously we know them very well , and to them we were like innocent juniors and some of them including me were liked by her elder brother and we didn’t wanna take advantage of that .
And with all this thought in our mind and talks we slowly moved through her house’s direction and yah we finally reached her home and like we talked about the time and stuff earlier , I was waiting for her to come to her balcony like window , and she wasn’t seen to be present in the house and we were actually aware about what we saw ,as their cousins and their parents left in their car , so we were just careful with her brothers crossing our line too at any times coz we were standing in front of their house and there is high possiblity that they’ll get doubts y we were standing over there ,
And while we were waiting , we suddenly noticed a stranger walking past us from a house aside of her home and it felt awkwardly strange , that he came and sat aside of where I was sitting and my friends were staring at each other , and to be LMAO , I had no fuckin idea whotf was he , but he sat . Strangely within 5 mins he started to talk with me , like he has NVR seen me over here and y am I waiting here , my friends waiting in a position to run seeing me like I was like their godfather or something , and pretty well I convincingly tried to convert and change the topic of matching his language by speaking Malayalam too and watever topics he talked about , I acted like I had similar interests on them too , after a while I felt like have I come here to talk with him or wha!!! And every 5 mins I use to check her in her balcony window too 🤦
And after a moment I couldn’t control his amount of questions he was eager to ask and talk with me and I felt like he was turning the topics to gay talks and we all were laughing in a strange manner so that he doesn’t land in any doubt on us and then there would be high chances for him to say about us to her brothers , so technically without making him understand ,that we r about to leave and it’s been 9:30 pm and we have to leave , and wen we were about to go …..
Suddenly a door ahead of us opened and there she was , my love pin with a letter like cover and parcel in her hands ,waving at me with her house door opened at 60° .
And here was the fun part , the guy with whom we were talking was pretty confused of what he saw now to what I was talky to him and was stilled . I suddenly went ahead of the opened door direction !!! , Grabbed the parcel , told her to come tomorrow a bit faster and without looking back at that gay talk person , we walked fast and past till we reached 1 km from her house exactly , God alone knows what he thought and did after that , but hopefully nothing happened.
“Inside that cover that she gave was two key chains , where one of the keychain said NABEEL and I’ve that till now and one letter that had several pages which last words said like, I srsly can’t wait to see u in a 100 ways, I use to see ur crazy eyes and xxxxxx😝…. “
That day , I really had a Awsm feeling that night , I couldn’t sleep , I kept on reading her words as much as many times till my eyes melted away with beautiful sleep .
And pretty much everyday from this day beginning, we use to go to her balcony and sometimes to my ex crush balcony for my best friend and yah , I can’t deny that I had a lot of good time running away on Streets ringing bells at neighbourhood houses at a really bad time , everyday I used to meet her in her balcony and my loving to talk to her with signs like how people who can’t speak and hear talk to each other , but srsly yo , i had a really good feeling of memory that I can NVR forget till my death.
Everyday I had wonderful nights with seeing her face before going to sleep and the magical letters we used to write to each other ,
June 20 , 2016
I still regret to this day even today, that almost changed everything ( my love , me and my respect ) , like totally to upsidedown and to nothing .
Actually today in letters she told me not to come and u know about boys and their crazy mental levels and the things we do for love at sometimes and at some situations, we take things for too granted coz we feel that nothing bad happened yet . And thus like every other day , we bunked or prayed fast our prayers ( the precious prayers ) , and today we all went to simply roam and see whether what she told was truth or she would have said simply told me not to come . So there we were , first we went to my ex crushs home and then to her home and I know she was not there in her home , but still my best friend and some of my friends took small pebbles and threw at her balcony in a awareness that no one would be home , but here something unexpected happened that it turned out totally opposite and everyone was home on her side and her aunt saw us and without knowing what to do , in a hurry ,we all ran in different directions like we use to run when we use to ring and run the doorbells in some strangers home .
And out of us 5 , 2 guys spread and got lost , but me , my bff and my another friend got spotted by her brothers , and we were trapped when they bought there car in front of us to talk like some movie point live or die !!!, and also we didn’t run, in a confidence of we could manage the situation so we stood normally after they saw us , coz we don’t want them to know like y we really were standing in front of their house and I thought of ideas to manage the lie that I’m gonna say .
There they were ,they came in their car like some rich ppl and ordered is to sit in the car, we were ok with it as they seemed pretty confused on y we stood there in front of their home , I told my friends , I would talk , and like I said and was good at making stories ,and I totally convinced them by saying it was a misunderstanding by their aunt bcoz , we visit to their street daily to simply roam and it was pretty convincing coz they had seen us to roaming in their streets plenty of time , and also one of our friends home was in this street too, and somehow we talked them out of this , and we made em out coz they know us too , and they had no idea I had something going on with their sister and we had to mark our death day on our calendar .
Everything looked and seemed like they turned out back to its place , and in return for what she gave to me that day about those letters and keychains (which I wore to school for several weeks) , with all my precious savings I bought two dress pins thats worth’s a playstation ( to be frank ), and that night I gave it to my other friend, who was in the car with me talking them out of the problem , to keep it safe for me for sometime coz we planned not to roam in that street for some weeks as we promised to her brothers for them saying that their aunt find us disturbing in their streets , so we were like ok..
Everything was fine and everyone felt out of problem until the real problem came at night 12:45 banging at my house the same day , the earliest morning of June 21 ,
where through my another friend ;I told above I gave my gift pins that I had bought for her ,to , was caught out that we were lying by their brothers in the car, (coz my other friend was more closer to them than me )and that too their aunt revieled some of my Lost letters that went missing under my bus seat to be Found of her school bag and everything was totally messed up and it came through my tactics itself , using my own friend to ring my door bell and call me out for iftar party ( a fake reason ) and her brother’s standing on the side corner of my house ( a kind of party , we use to keep it on night , especially in Ramadan month for fasting purpose ) and I had to go , coz in one side I didn’t want my parents to know , and in other side , I didn’t want my friends to get fucked up bcuz of my matters .
In 2 Hours !!! They met all three of us , whom they spotted earlier where we talked them out and Bet us all 3 of us up so badly , and tbfh I didn’t even feel any bit of pain when they beat me saying , that she didn’t even cry for their parents death , but she cried for u Infront of their aunt when they found out my and her letters lying full in her bag and I felt bad about that , coz the words they used had a lot of metaphor in them , so I remained silent without offending or doing anything like blocking them and let them beat me coz I feel like I deserved it, but it was totally opposite when my best friend and my other friends got beaten up so badly in front of my eyes for me , I felt my tears burning down my eyes to the cheeks where the pain of it was too much to be felt than I thought about how it could be processed and even after Hours of us missing (it was 2:00 am at morning ),our fathers came to search for us and since our fathers were connected , the only thing I asked this brothers to not to say to my parents was also revieled and I felt like I was dead and I was the only one responsible for all this!!!
From my mom till my grandparents who were in india at that time and everyone of my uncles who had so much respect on me came to know about this incident like simply ” I was beaten up for loving a girl ” and I felt so hurtful about it coz they heard it like that.
All I did was cry coz it was so strange when I thought for why she stole my letters under my bus seat , y she gave me those keychains , and 100 of questions like This , revolving around around my brain like the earth revolves the sun for no reason , but it’s got to follow a simple word called nature.
I don’t know , how much she fought for me , but I was forced to throw all her letters unlike her revealing it front of her aunt , I just don’t want her to be guilty over here coz some of my uncles and their brothers had a meeting like personally for y they bet us for doing nothing and to discuss all these they kept meetings like a FiR investigation,and I didn’t have a single idea on what they were discussing about except I heard that they meet up for eating and drinking sandwiches and hot beverages .
Atlast my dad came for my key chains which she gave me , which I had thrown away too 😭 , for her (later like street picker , I searched for them for days and I got one of the key chains like I said earlier which had my name NABEEL written on it .)
But I totally left her, after I heard some of her friends saying to me that she said that she said : she was sleeping at her home when we got fucked up that day with her brothers ,so carelessly and she didn’t know anything about it!!! That turned on the real tears in me and made my mind to give up on her and leave her , and even though till today we NVR officially broke up but we just left .
The day after this incident happen , every girl in my bus as well us in my locality saw me like I was some some kind of Kabir Singh and romeo sacrificing themselves for a simple love .
And it clearly felt like I was a villain in front of my parents and neighbours eyes and a hero in front of all the friends and unknown boys and girls who knows me like a bit farer !!!
Later I felt out she still loves me and followed me in different accounts and sometimes even spoke to me too , but I couldn’t accept her back coz my mind was made up as mentioned earlier I was not that good vibe to her life that she needed.
But after this scene I knew that it was all about the things I do for love and taht is what matters till end , not how much u love em or what costly gifts u give them to make em feel belonged to u ,
And yah like some of my uncles who think of them as scholars told, yah , “I moved on !!!” And landed up with another girl on tution , who totally cleared my stammering problems from where once I was struggling to say my name to talking so confidently today Infront of so many people and making them understand what I thought this was considered to be impossible by me at one point of my life .
Well trust me , it took an entire 7 months to realise something’s when I saw it from different point of view , but everything is always the same like it always was , always see things from different angle so that u don’t only feel stuff when u land up in problems itself .
I don’t know how but Like some big daddy always said ; i fell it love too again !!!
Actually this was when I Went to a tution for my 10th board exams , and I found a love there too , but here too , she came in , cleared up my stammer that I considered to be impossible to change .
And yah again same story she ended up blocking me in 388 + accounts in Instagram itself and till today she didn’t say me y she left but yah I had great memories with her too , but zero problems with her coz this time I purposely engaged in a type of relationship where I don’t want any brothers over here again , and like I expected she had only 5 Sisters 😝( but I nvr gave up on her , coz its always like , we only understand some shit when we go through something big in them called problems )
With all these pain in a pin called love ,+ I understood one concept so straight that each love teaches us different point of decisions and problematic descriptions in details as we face in our lyf in a trailer manner and most importantly ,NVR to make a same mistake twice .
Every one including me , today , we mostly wanna talk about love , the love we wanna show to someone from our side, like loving him or her to the fullest .
But mostly we never consider love, to the concept of loving our mom, our lovely dog , our work and overall our life , and completely giving up on loving ourselves .
We all know that no body would really take up our side especially in bad conditions or in worst part of our life except Ur parents and limited friends (depending upon the problem ) , coz they don’t have to and mostly everybody is obviously keen and selfish about their own survival in this life .
BELIEF! says we have another life in the life after death , but mostly who believes all these , eventhough we say it through words through echos from our mouth saying ” I blv ” , mostly internally we don’t believe , so mostly here it proves we love our life so much than anything in this world ,
But there are Always some ugly truths to which we know, that those are the real truth but we can’t accept the reality coz the reality is hard and painful to accept in so many situations ,
Lemme give u a best ex. , Before a fight with someone , mayb our friends or someone in Ur school / clg or someone in your locality , before fight we talk so much that we r gonna swallow him without even chewing ; but when it comes to the fight , the real reality fight , we don’t even pull our hands out of our pockets most cases , and we fear satisfying ourself sayings ,let him make the lead move first .
So what he told through his angry words with respect to how much he love himself and his ego to live in this words , he win with his raised voice , because he loves himself so much , and he can’t give up on himself and he cries for himself at most points .
cmon, who will give up on themselves until it’s for something called fuckin love u have on someone ,whom u feel like u love the most at some point of ur life , where u forget that u can’t love anyone forever , coz no one ever did , and no body can except loving urself .
Like I said it’s the ugly truth , mostly u wanna give the love u have on Ur hands to someone so much , that they can’t forget u till they die , but here too u make a big mistake of believing , that the person whom u r loving is not u , he or she might have a different point of thinking and mostly if Ur love is so pure to that person , it most cases , it goes wrong and u end up in bar , fuckin up your health .
Not mostly everyone end up in bar , NOT ME !!! but still the pain of love , a true love is so hard to process as the time passes by without them ,
we don’t realise their value when they r with us , realisation becomes worse only when they r not with us and sometimes more worse if they r with someone else and we r seeing them at the moment .,
Like my heading says , love people , it’s not a problem , but do understand that the ugly truth love like the love of Ur mom and dad and the love a dog has over u are something that is not ever given to u like u search someone to show Ur love on and mostly nothing can be compared with the jealousy of love that u have on Ur life that beats through Ur ears melting into pain!!!
So save some love for urself too , coz finally it’s u , who’s gonna lead Ur way to death in Ur death bed fighting for Ur life , coz like I said , mahn ! I know the fucked up things we do for a person we love , plz don’t say no , but also know that it’s not about money concept over here , coz money stands with u only when u r rich , but love must stand when u r happy and especially more happily when u r sad and worried in Ur old age trying to reshape past .
Trust me , some of the above contents are some sentences or advices said by many old people who have suffered alone lying in rich money and wealth , but no one to love them except their dog and the person whom they see everyday when they look inthe mirror .
And all they said was to love yourself , and they said I’ll understand this value of those two words only with time and I’m still in search of their ugly truths.